Chapter 23: Death, Loss, Pain, and the End of Separation - Awakening To One Love
Overview
In Chapter 23 of Awakening To One Love, Beth Geer enters a deeply compassionate dialogue with the Holy Spirit on death, grief, loss, and physical pain. Drawing from Workbook Lessons 291–300 of A Course in Miracles, this chapter gently reframes suffering through stillness, forgiveness, and the remembrance of eternal holiness.
Through reflections on death, the ending of relationships, and bodily pain, the chapter offers comfort without denial—affirming grief as a natural part of healing while revealing that no true separation has ever occurred. With tenderness and clarity, this chapter invites readers to see beyond the body to the enduring union of Spirit, where love is never lost and peace is restored.
Chapter 23: Death, Loss and Pain
This Chapter addresses ACIM Workbook Lessons 291-300
Followed by a discussion with the Holy Spirit on: Death, Loss and Pain
Lesson 291. is is a day of stillness and of peace.
HS: Stillness and peace cannot come to you while you hold hands with the ego. When your peace is disturbed in any way, you can be sure it is of the ego. Let forgiveness peacefully lay these thoughts to rest in stillness and peace. Despite what your fears may be, a happy outcome to all things is sure.
Lesson 292. A happy outcome to all things is sure.
HS: Know that a happy outcome to all your problems is assured. However, while you think the ego can bring you what you want, happiness will escape you. Yet, God has promised that you will not have to wait forever. Nothing can prevent God’s Will from being done on earth. All things you now perceive as “problems” will have a happy ending. Have faith that all fear is past and only love is here.
Lesson 293. All fear is past and only love is here.
HS: The ego has no hold on you. You are entirely safe in the present moment. To be fully in the present moment, is forgiveness. It is a state in which you have let all things be exactly as they are. You cannot live in two places at once. You must choose between the past or the present. When you are fully present, all is forgiven and fear is truly past; being both behind you, and gone. Your body and the past it holds, is nothing. Forgive the body. It is a wholly neutral thing.
Lesson 294. My body is a wholly neutral thing.
HS: The body is a mask. When you are tempted to believe it is real, you must remember the one eternal truth about yourself: you are united in a holy relationship as God’s One Son. Forget this, and you are thrown into darkness and illusion. The body is to be neither vilified nor exalted. Its only purpose, is to serve as your vehicle for forgiveness. It is a wholly neutral thing. You must see it as a window through which the Holy Spirit may look out of you.
Lesson 295. The Holy Spirit looks through me today.
HS: When you choose to allow the Holy Spirit to look through your eyes, you will see a world forgiven of all its sin and separation. Through this way of seeing, the dream is slowly lifted from your sight. When you see the world as innocent, you can’t help but see yourself as innocent along with it. You cannot be saved alone. It is through your willingness to see the sameness of God in all, that you are redeemed together. You appear as many forms, but you are each awakening to One Love. Accept this as your vision, and the Holy Spirit is allowed to speak to the world through you.
Lesson 296. The Holy Spirit speaks through me today.
HS: My Voice cannot be heard without your being still and peaceful inside. My Voice cannot be heard above the loud complaints of the ego. I condemn no one, and neither should you. You have used God’s power to hide the real world of Heaven, and so you have the power to reveal it once again; through forgiveness. This is the greatest gift you can bestow upon the world and your brethren. Forgiveness is the only gift you need give.
Lesson 297. Forgiveness is the only gift I give.
HS: What you give, is what you receive. This is the Law of Love, the Law of Life and the Law of God. Some have called it the Law of Attraction. It cannot be escaped. Therefore, let forgiveness be the only gift you give, for it is the only thing you need. Giving and receiving are the same, because you are One in God. You cannot love your Father, without also loving His Son.
Lesson 298. I love You, Father, and I love Your Son.
HS: You cannot see what lies behind the body. Because of this, you can hardly be blamed for forgetting your love for one another; for failing at times to treat each other with kindness. Accept instead only what God has established as yours; your holy Sonship in Him. You must learn to walk through this world of illusion, knowing that eternal holiness abides in each of you.
Lesson 299. Eternal holiness abides in me.
HS: The body fills your senses and it can be difficult to see yourself as anything else. But God has not forgotten the eternal holiness abiding in you.
His senses are not clouded. He sees only the truth in you. Your holiness cannot be undone. God Wills that you remember the holiness He created you as. Once you remember this, then only an instant longer will this world endure for you.
Lesson 300. Only an instant does this world endure.
HS: This statement brings great sadness to those who hold tightly to the ego, hoping to find happiness in this world. For those who are seeking release from pain, they are words of a glad release; the happy promise of eternal joy. There is nothing here in the world that you can take with you into the Kingdom of Heaven, because none of it is real. Only the Eternal Holiness abiding within you is real, and this alone is welcomed into His Kingdom. The holy instant you accept this truth, the world as you know it will cease to endure and you will move beyond it to eternity.
Discussion with the Holy Spirit: Death, Loss and Pain
ME: When You talk about us moving beyond this world to eternity, are You talking about our physical death?
HS: No. I am talking about your true Life in Spirit. I am talking about a shift in your perception; a shift in awareness. It is a shift from seeing this world; the world you made in opposition to Me; to seeing My world. The world I created is the only real world there is. The world you currently see was born of sacrifice. You have sacrificed your Perfect Vision of Oneness in order to experience this illusion of separation. Please insert-
ME: I got it, I got it. Intuitive quote fetching person at Your service.
The following quotations from the Course are from TEXT Chapter 26 — I. The “Sacrifice” of Oneness
“The world you see is based on “sacrifice” of oneness. It is a picture of complete disunity and total lack of joining. Around each entity is built a wall so seeming solid that it looks as if what is inside can never reach without, and what is out can never reach and join with what is locked away within the wall.
Each part must sacrifice the other part, to keep itself complete. For if they joined each one would lose its own identity, and by their separation are their selves maintained.” (2:1-5)
“The body is a loss, and can be made to sacrifice. And while you see your brother as a body, apart from you and separate in his cell, you are demanding sacri ce of him and you.” (4:1-2)
“You can lose sight of oneness, but can not make sacrifice of its reality. Nor can you lose what you would sacrifice, nor keep the Holy Spirit from His task of showing you that it has not been lost.” (6:1-2)
ME: Okay, so we “sacrificed” our vision of Oneness in order to experience being in separate bodies, but in reality, we are One, whether we see bodies or not.
HS: Correct.
ME: But the body can be lost, and even though we aren’t supposed to see one another as a body, it still hurts like hell when a loved one is lost. So will You please explain to me how we’re supposed to deal with the emotional pain of death in light of our Oneness?
HS: I would love to.
ME: And You know what else hurts? The ending of a relationship. Sometimes that can hurt just as much as death, so I’d like to know how we should deal with that as well. I mean, losing someone is losing someone, right?
HS: Most certainly.
ME: And don’t just say that bodies aren’t real so we should just forgive them and let go of the pain. It’s not that simple to do during the throws of agony. That thought isn’t really helpful when we first experience the death or loss of someone, if You know what I mean?
HS: I promise I will not just tell you to forgive the body and let it go.
ME: Good. Alright then. Go ahead, I’m listening.
HS: First, I will address your question about how to deal with the pain of losing a loved one to death of the body. I will explain this through a brief exercise.
ME: Alright. That sounds fun.
HS: I want you to stop and take a moment to touch your own arm. It feels as though it is the real you, does it not?
ME: Yes, my skin feels like it’s part of me.
HS: Now imagine yourself touching someone else’s body with yours; someone you love very much. Imagine holding them in a deep, tender, loving embrace. Perhaps you caress their face, and give their cheek a gentle kiss. Now simply rest your forehead against theirs.
ME: Got it. I’m imagining that I’m holding and loving my two children. I’m really enjoying this exercise so far by the way.
HS: Good. Now, you feel such love for them, and they are dear to you. Under these circumstances, you feel supremely close to them, do you not?
ME: Yes, I feel very close to them like this.
HS: Now. I’m going to tell you something very important. Pay close attention.
ME: I’m totally listening here. I’m literally hanging o the edge of my seat. I’m not even breathing.
HS: This tender embrace is as far apart as you will ever be from those whom you hold dear. This is as far away from one another as you can possibly get. Nothing separates you more than the flesh. Physical bodies are a very real barrier to you.
ME: What? But if one of my children were to die, they would suddenly feel extremely far away from me. I don’t ever want that.
HS: I tell you this; though you would miss their face, their touch, and the sound of their voice, you are never as far apart as you are now while you think you are in bodies. Nothing is closer than Oneness in My Spirit, and nothing separates you more than this dream of being in a body. As you are now, you are as far away from your loved ones as you will ever be. Once one of you departs from the physical, the rejoining process begins. You cannot see them, but they are there, waiting for your imminent return, knowing your seeming separation is but an instant in eternity. Upon your happy return, you will be together forever. You will never feel this much space between you again.
ME: At least not until we decide to come back here into bodies and forget everything again.
HS: Who says you have to return? It is My goal to help you to cease making the choice of separation to begin with.
ME: Oh yeah. I’d love to stop doing that.
HS: You never knew you had a choice until now.
ME: Right. And I want to point something out to You now; You did actually tell me the body isn’t real, and we should forgive it. You just used a roundabout way to do it.
HS: I did not go back on my word. I gave you no trifle thing here. The pain of loss will heal of its own accord when the body is properly perceived.
ME: I believe You. Yes, You gave me new perspective beautifully, and I thank You. It’s comforting to know that this is as far away as I will ever be from those I love.
HS: You are only dreaming of death. It is not a real experience. You never leave anyone, and no one ever leaves you.
The following quotations from the Course are from MANUAL FOR TEACHERS 27. What Is Death?
“Death is the central dream from which all illusions stem. Is it not madness to think of life as being born, aging, losing vitality, and dying in the end?” (1:1-2)
“In this perception of the universe as God created it, it would be impossible to think of Him as loving. For who has decreed that all things pass away, ending in dust and disappointment and despair, can but be feared.” (2:1-2)
“Death is the symbol of the fear of God.” (3:1)
“The “reality” of death is firmly rooted int he belief that God’s Son is a body. And if God created bodies, death would indeed be real. But God would not be loving.” (5:1-3)
“Without the idea of death there is no world. All dreams will end with this one. is is salvation’s nal goal; the end of all Illusions.” (6:3-5)
“Teacher of God, your one assignment could be stated thus: Accept no compromise in which death plays a part. Do not believe in cruelty, nor let attack conceal the truth from you. What seems to die has but been misperceived and carried to illusion. Now it becomes your task to let the illusion be carried to the truth. Be steadfast but in this; be not deceived by the “reality” of any changing form. Truth neither moves nor wavers nor sinks down to death and dissolution. And what is the end of death? Nothing but this; the realization that the Son of God is guiltless now and forever. Nothing but this. But do not let yourself forget it is not less than this.” (7:1-10)
HS: The body is an illusion of changing form and nothing more. It is not real; not you. The death of it is nothing, because the body is indeed truly nothing. Though the loss of it grieves you, understand no one has gone anywhere except to exit the dream they were a body. Simultaneously rejoice in their freedom from hell.
ME: Awhile back, I had a dream about loosing all my loved ones. I went out looking for them, thinking everyone had abandoned me. After I grew tired of looking for them, I decided to return home. Once I got back, I found they'd all been at home waiting for me the whole time. It turned out that I was actually the one who'd left them.
HS: Each one of you is truly a prodigal son. It is the truth that you have actually left them. Heaven is your true Home, and this dream is the place you have journeyed to. Yet no one has really gone anywhere. No one has been lost or stolen from you. You are all still together, no matter what your external circumstances appear to look like. All you need do is follow My gentle path of ease and light to return to them. Upon your return, you will find that your loved ones have been waiting for you this entire time. Here, when there is a death, you think the person has left you, but you have the process backwards. Death of the body is actually the beginning of the return journey Home to Me. And I walk with you every step of the way. Do not fear this transition.
The following quotations from the Course are from TEXT Chapter 18 — III. Light in the Dream
“If you knew Who walks beside you on the way that you have chosen, fear would be impossible. You do not know because the journey into darkness has been long and cruel, and you have gone deep into it.” (3:2-3)
“When you retreat to the illusion your fear increases, for there is little doubt that what you think it means is fearful. Yet what is that to us who travel surely and very swiftly away from fear?” (3:8-9)
“You do not understand what you accepted, but remember that your understanding is not necessary. All that was necessary was merely the wish to understand. at wish was the desire to be holy. e Will of God is granted you. For you desire the only thing you ever had, or ever were.” (4:11-15)
“Your desire is now in complete accord with all the power of the Holy Spirit’s Will.” (5:3)
“I hold your hand as surely as you agreed to take your brother’s. You will not separate, for I stand with you and walk with you in your advance to truth. And where we go we carry God with us.” (5:5-7)
“Let not time worry you, for all the fear that you and your brother experience is really past. Time has been readjusted to help us do, together, what your separate pasts would hinder.” (7:5-6)
“You and your brother are coming home together, after a long and meaningless journey that you undertook apart, and that lead nowhere. You have found your brother, and you will light each other’s way.” (8:5-6)
ME: That all sounds very nice, but while we're still stuck here, it sucks to feel left behind. Is it alright to grieve for those we've lost? I mean, You don't expect us to be happy about them returning Home, do You?
HS: Of course not. Grieving is a natural part of the healing process. You cannot accept what you do not acknowledge. Accept and acknowledge your losses in the way that’s most comfortable for you, for the length of time you need. Just know, that one day you will rejoice in your holy Union once again. A Union more complete and loving than you have words on earth to describe. All suffering will be forgotten as the separation of the body is forgotten.
ACIM Preface xii.
“Only minds can really join, and whom God has joined no man can put asunder. It is, however, only at the level of Christ Mind that true union is possible, and has, in fact, never been lost.”
ME: I love the idea of being One with everyone and that we never truly separate. Believing this takes some of the sting out of death I guess. Can You explain to me now how we should deal with the ending of relationships? It’s not quite the same as death, but it can feel just as painful.
HS: Again, all you need is the proper perspective of what a body is for in a relationship in order to bring healing.
ME: Well, it's for loving the other person, isn't it?
HS: Close. It is for creating peace. The goal of every relationship, is peace. Once you have peace, the relationship manifests happiness, joy, and love. Where there is no peace, there is no love. And peace can be found whether bodies are together or not. It is up to you to decide under what circumstances peace is attained.
ME: Um, what?
HS: Peace cannot be found while you hold the body responsible for your happiness. Therefore, the body must sometimes be removed from your sight, in order to see My Spirit within them. You must therefore give all your relationships to Me, and I will make them holy. This may sometimes appear to be a painful process of separation, but do not fear this transition. I will bring you peace whether bodies are together or not. It is through the healing of all your special love and special hate relationships- those relationships where you treat another with "special" feelings- that you will come to remember My peace.
The following quotations from the Course are from TEXT Chapter 16 — IV. The Illusion and the Reality of Love
“Be not afraid to look upon the special hate relationship, for freedom lies in looking at it. It would be impossible not to know the meaning of love, except for this. For the special love relationship, in which the meaning of love is hidden, is undertaken solely to o set the hate, but not to let it go. Your salvation will rise clearly before your open eyes as you look on this.” (1:1-4)
“The symbols of hate against the symbols of love play out a con ict that does not exist.” (2:1)
“You will go through this last undoing quite unharmed, and will at last emerge as yourself. is is the last step in the readiness for God. Be not unwilling now; you are too near, and you will cross the bridge in perfect safety, translated quietly from war to peace.” (2:3-5)
“The special love relationship is an attempt to limit the destructive e ects of hate by nding a haven in the storm of guilt.” (3:1)
“The special love relationship is not perceived as a value in itself, but as a place of safety from which hatred is split o and kept apart. e special love partner is acceptable only as long as he serves this purpose. Hatred can enter, and indeed is welcome in some aspects of the relationship, but it is still held together by the illusion of love. If the illusion goes, the relationship is broken or becomes unsatisfying on the grounds of disillusionment.” (3:4-7)
“It is sure that those who select certain ones as partners in any aspect of living, and use them for any purpose which they would not share with others, are trying to live with guilt rather than die of it.” (4:5)
“They seek it desperately, but not in the peace in which it would gladly come quietly to them. And when they nd the fear of death is still upon them, the love relationship loses the illusion that it is what it is not.” (5:4-5)
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and nd all of the barriers within yourself that you have built against. It.” (6:1)
“Every illusion is one of fear, whatever form it takes. And the attempt to escape from one illusion into another must fail. If you seek love outside yourself you can be certain that you perceive hatred within, and are afraid of it.” (6.:3-5)
“Recognize this, for it is true, and truth must be recognized if it is to be distinguished from illusion: e special love relationship is an attempt to bring love into separation.” (7:1)
“It is essential that we look very closely at exactly what it is you think you can do to solve the dilemma which seems very real to you, but which does not exist. You have come close to truth, and only this stands between you and the bridge that leads you into it.” (7:5-6)
“Across the bridge is your completion, for you will be wholly in God, willing for nothing special, but only to be wholly like to Him, completing Him by your completion.” (9:1)
“Seek not for this in the bleak world of illusion, where nothing is certain and where everything fails to satisfy. In the Name of God, be wholly willing to abandon all illusions.” (9:4-5)
“Every fantasy, be it of love or hate, deprives you of knowledge for fantasies are the veil behind which truth is hidden.” (10:3)
“The journey that seemed endless is almost complete, for what is endless is very near. You have almost recognized it. Turn with me rmly away from all illusions now, and let nothing stand in the way of truth. We will take the last useless journey away from truth together, and then together we go straight to God, in joyous answer to His Call for His completion.” (12:3-6)
ME: Ah. So as long as we continue to see relationships between bodies as the source of our happiness, we are only perpetuating the illusion. We cannot place the duty of our happiness on others. In this illusion we promise to love someone, but only as long as the person does what we want. Once the other person deviates from our rules for happiness in a relationship, it turns to hate. We get mad at them, and our special love relationship turns to a special hate relationship. We then sometimes decide to physically separate. Right?
HS: Correct. A relationship not at peace, is painful. No one enjoys this type of situation. It is up to you how peace is restored. You can decide to have peace with the other person, or without them. Either way, you must let go of all thoughts of conflict about them. Forget that they are a body. You must let go of the idea that their bodily presence and actions are the source of your happiness. The source of your happiness is your Union in peace with them through Me. Nothing else will bring you happiness.
ME: I'll need to practice thinking like that. I have one more question about pain. What about physical pain? Is there a special way we should see that too?
HS: Yes. Physical pain is strongly linked to physical pleasure, and they are both demonstrations of your belief in sin- the error in belief you are a body.
The following quotations are from: ACIM T. Chapter 27 VI. The Witnesses to Sin
"Pain demonstrates the body must be real. It is a loud, obscuring voice whose shrieks would silence what the Holy Spirit says, and keep His words from your awareness. Pain compels attention, drawing it away from Him and focusing upon itself. Its purpose is the same as pleasure, for they both are means to make the body real." (1.1-4)
"Pleasure and pain are equally unreal, because their purpose cannot be achieved." (1.7)
"Sin shifts from pain to pleasure, and again to pain. For either witness is the same, and carries but one message: "You are here, within this body, and you can be hurt. You can have pleasure, too, but only at the cost of pain."" (2.1-3)
"This body, purposeless within itself, holds all your memories and all your hopes. You use its eyes to see, its ears to hear, and let it tell you what it feels. It does not know." (3.1-3)
"Each miracle He brings is witness that the body is not real. Its pains and pleasures does He heal alike, for all sin's witnesses do His replace." (4.8-9)
"It matters not the name by which you called your suffering. It is no longer there. The One Who brings the miracle perceives them all as one, and called by name of fear." (5.4-6)
"Yet to the One Who sends forth miracles to bless the world, a tiny stab of pain, a little worldly pleasure, and the throes of death itself are but a single sound; a call for healing, and a plaintive cry for help within a world of misery." (6.6)
"There is no need to suffer any more. But there is need that you be healed, because the suffering and sorrow of the world have made it deaf to its salvation and deliverance." (7.2-3)
"Offer the miracle of the holy instant through the Holy Spirit, and leave His giving it to you to Him." (15.1)
ME: So all forms of pain and pleasure are really just one big distraction? It's the ego trying to demonstrate to us that we are a body and not Spirit? How do we overcome this?
HS: You don't overcome anything by yourself. I take care of your pain through your relinquishment of it to Me in the holy instant. All pain will cease the moment you choose to be healed, and you choose healing through forgiveness of sin.
ME: And sin is the error of belief we are a body. Gah! That's so hard to remember!
HS: Just remember that all pain is simply a cry for help; be it your pain, or someone else's. It's all the same cry for release from this illusion, and whatever form the pain takes, it all requires the same answer: You are My holy Son, and I am your Father. Be healed of all pain through forgiving what you are not, and acceptance of Who You Are.
ME: That sounds easier said than done.
HS: Indeed, and I restate that you cannot do it alone. I am here to help you. I have come to wipe away all your tears.
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About the Author: Beth Geer
Beth Geer is a long-time student and teacher of A Course in Miracles, known for her Holy Spirit–channeled messages and her ability to translate ACIM principles into living, breathing spiritual practice. Through her books, YouTube teachings, and Monthly Miracle Minded Messages, Beth guides seekers toward forgiveness, inner peace, and awakening to Love.
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